Inspiration from Oz..........
DVSNCYNIKL
07-03-2004, 05:53 PM
Oz just inspired me...
I don't know how they wrote this with a straight face. This was a real memo sent out by a computer company (IBM) to its employees in all seriousness. It went to all field engineers regarding a computer peripheral problem. The author of this memo was quite genuine. The engineers rolled on the floor! Especially note the last couple of sentences...
To: Whom this may concern
Re: Replacement of mouse balls
If a mouse fails to operate or should it perform erratically, it may need a ball replacement.
Mouse balls are now available as FRU (Field Replacement Units). Because of the delicate nature of this procedure, replacement of mouse balls should only be attempted by properly trained personnel.
Before proceeding, determine the type of mouse balls by examining the underside of the mouse. Domestic balls will be larger and harder than foreign balls. Ball removal procedures differ depending upon the manufacturer of the mouse. Foreign balls can be replaced using the pop off method.
Domestic balls are replaced by using the twist off method.. Mouse balls are not usually static sensitive. However, excessive handling can result in sudden discharge.
Upon completion of ball replacement, the mouse may be used immediately. It is recommended that each person have a pair of spare balls for maintaining optimum customer satisfaction.
Any customer missing his balls should contact the local personnel in charge of removing and replacing these necessary items.
Please keep in mind that a customer without properly working balls is an unhappy customer.
I don't know how they wrote this with a straight face. This was a real memo sent out by a computer company (IBM) to its employees in all seriousness. It went to all field engineers regarding a computer peripheral problem. The author of this memo was quite genuine. The engineers rolled on the floor! Especially note the last couple of sentences...
To: Whom this may concern
Re: Replacement of mouse balls
If a mouse fails to operate or should it perform erratically, it may need a ball replacement.
Mouse balls are now available as FRU (Field Replacement Units). Because of the delicate nature of this procedure, replacement of mouse balls should only be attempted by properly trained personnel.
Before proceeding, determine the type of mouse balls by examining the underside of the mouse. Domestic balls will be larger and harder than foreign balls. Ball removal procedures differ depending upon the manufacturer of the mouse. Foreign balls can be replaced using the pop off method.
Domestic balls are replaced by using the twist off method.. Mouse balls are not usually static sensitive. However, excessive handling can result in sudden discharge.
Upon completion of ball replacement, the mouse may be used immediately. It is recommended that each person have a pair of spare balls for maintaining optimum customer satisfaction.
Any customer missing his balls should contact the local personnel in charge of removing and replacing these necessary items.
Please keep in mind that a customer without properly working balls is an unhappy customer.
lostprophets
07-03-2004, 05:56 PM
wow that's retarded :rofl:
psychobadboy
07-03-2004, 06:00 PM
It is recommended that each person have a pair of spare balls for maintaining optimum customer satisfaction.
I don't carry spares...will this hurt "customer satisfaction"? :(
Haha. Funny in a stupid kind of way. :lol2:
I don't carry spares...will this hurt "customer satisfaction"? :(
Haha. Funny in a stupid kind of way. :lol2:
iranintoavan
07-03-2004, 06:00 PM
Hahahahah
RSX-S777
07-03-2004, 06:01 PM
I've phased out my balls in favor of a laser. Now my unit is much more reliable...
Sean
07-03-2004, 06:08 PM
I'm ball-less (?) too. The Future is now!
Karen512
07-03-2004, 06:10 PM
I'm ball-less (?) too.
Me too!! No balls for me :uhoh:
Hahaha!
Me too!! No balls for me :uhoh:
Hahaha!
Moppie
07-03-2004, 07:11 PM
:repost: http://www.automotiveforums.com/vbulletin/showthread.php?t=50677&highlight=Mouse+balls
Your getting old DVS. :p :p
Your getting old DVS. :p :p
RazorGTR
07-03-2004, 07:16 PM
:repost: http://www.automotiveforums.com/vbulletin/showthread.php?t=50677&highlight=Mouse+balls
Your getting old DVS. :p :p
Hahahaha same old Moppie quick on the trigger!
Your getting old DVS. :p :p
Hahahaha same old Moppie quick on the trigger!
Raz_Kaz
07-03-2004, 08:00 PM
What if you have a optical mouse?
:screwy:
:screwy:
RazorGTR
07-03-2004, 08:18 PM
What if you have a optical mouse?
:screwy:
Wouldn't you then have to visit the Optomitrist? :naughty:
:screwy:
Wouldn't you then have to visit the Optomitrist? :naughty:
Hyatus
07-03-2004, 09:28 PM
Any customer missing his balls should contact the local personnel in charge of removing and replacing these necessary items.
Please keep in mind that a customer without properly working balls is an unhappy customer.
i hate it when i'm missing my balls, or when there not working properly like after a wild night of partying.
Please keep in mind that a customer without properly working balls is an unhappy customer.
i hate it when i'm missing my balls, or when there not working properly like after a wild night of partying.
Oz
07-04-2004, 02:22 AM
:lol: I'm here to serve ;)
Karen512
07-04-2004, 02:29 AM
:lol: I'm here to serve ;)
You are serving up your balls, what!?
mmmmmmmm, balls! I'll have two please.
You are serving up your balls, what!?
mmmmmmmm, balls! I'll have two please.
Moppie
07-04-2004, 04:04 AM
:lol: I'm here to serve ;)
You ain't going anywhere near my balls! :uhoh: :uhoh:
You ain't going anywhere near my balls! :uhoh: :uhoh:
96Civ
07-04-2004, 04:19 AM
"However, excessive handling can result in sudden discharge."
How did they figure THAT one out.. :lol:
How did they figure THAT one out.. :lol:
Sean
07-04-2004, 03:15 PM
You ain't going anywhere near my balls! :uhoh: :uhoh:
Look out Moppie, Oz has a tennis racket!
Look out Moppie, Oz has a tennis racket!
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