i'm an ass, and i need to break up wit the gf.

well here's the story. I've been going out with this girl named Racheal for 2 years n' 4 months. I made plans to go to college at Hesser in Manchester. We've been having our problems, and she's been hating how i go out n' not talk to her. it's like we're drifting apart. I live in CT and she lives in NH. basically a long distance relationship. I've always been telling her that i was moving there soon. She always would say it's far away.

Then this other girl named Christina came to me. We hung out yesterday morning. Talked for awhile. Then after i went to work, i went to her house again and stayed there till 1am. She held my hands n' i gave her a kiss on the lips at the end of the night. Tonight, i went n' picked her up a pink rose n' put it in my car before i picked her up from work. Then later on, we just sat in her bed hanging out. she once again wanted me to hold her hands so i did. Then couple seconds later, she's like "can i kiss you?" n' she just goes ahead n' kisses me lol. We end up kissing a couple times tonight. With all this shit going on, i remembered that i'm still going out with racheal. I am now officially a asshole. Then after i left, we did our thing n' i went online. she then says "i have a question, what are "we"?" i said "i can't decide what "we" are, but you being my gf wouldn't be a bad idea" she then goes on saying she would like to. so now...i have 2 gf's. I HAVE to dump one. Christina had a hard life n' all her bf's treated her n' her mom like complete shit. I wanted to change that for her n' show her that there is someone out there that cares about her. If i stay with christina, then i can't go to college in NH. if i dont stay with christina, then i go to college in NH n' stay with racheal, but the feeling between me n' racheal wouldn't be the same. How should i let racheal go, like what should i tell her?

Sit her down and say that things aint working out, give her the reasons and maybe she will understand.

Welcome to one of the laws of life.

When a girl breaks up with you its because its better for both of you. When you break up with a girl its because you're an asshole.

You can't win. Let her know as susinctly as possible in a place where she doesn't have to leave (do it at her home if possible) and deal with the fact she's going to be PISSED.













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I must say, your writing style annoys the fuck out of me.

I must say, your writing style annoys the fuck out of me.

seriousley, Rhys, i think higher of you then this.

if you have nothing positive to post, don't fucking post at all cause i'm sick of you nitpicking out the smallest things to berate people with.

yes his writing style is annoying, but if you have nothing constructive to add as well, then don't just post what you just posted by itself.

Im going to agree with Zebrathree. I think he would be doing the young man a disservice in not pointing this fact out. This is the Stress Release Area- "Don't be offended by what's in here", remember? I would also like to suggest that Masta submit his dilemma to the writers of the new smash drama "The OC". Kissing... holding hands.....it's absolutely scandalous! What an age of loose morals we live in!

haha. go ahead n' flame me, i dont care :P It's pretty funny though.

There will be no flaming. Period.

Yogs is right man. No matter what you say, it's your fault. Sorry dude. Just deal with it best you can.

Well, technially there is no law that says you can't have two women, it's just a convention.

Think about, one in every area code, very pi-amp. Just pray and hope she doesn' find out

seriousley, Rhys, i think higher of you then this.

if you have nothing positive to post, don't fucking post at all cause i'm sick of you nitpicking out the smallest things to berate people with.

yes his writing style is annoying, but if you have nothing constructive to add as well, then don't just post what you just posted by itself.


If I can't read it, I can't post anything constructive, can I?

i'm just gonna let go of racheal. I dont feel anything for her really any more. Zebrathree, i'll read it out loud for you if u want. lol

LOL. At least you've got a sense of humour mate. I don't mean anything offensive with 70% of my posts; but sometimes I'm not subtle enough for my own good.

.... sometimes I'm not subtle enough for my own good.

Since when was there anything subtle about a Kiwi?

just don't dump her over the phone.. i did that and still havn't heard the end of it

amac, dude, change your phone number.

But yeah, I go with your call, do it face to face, at least give the other party that respect.

and wear a cup.....

Good luck

well here's the story. I've been going out with this girl named Racheal for 2 years n' 4 months. I made plans to go to college at Hesser in Manchester. We've been having our problems, and she's been hating how i go out n' not talk to her. it's like we're drifting apart. I live in CT and she lives in NH. basically a long distance relationship. I've always been telling her that i was moving there soon. She always would say it's far away.

Then this other girl named Christina came to me. We hung out yesterday morning. Talked for awhile. Then after i went to work, i went to her house again and stayed there till 1am. She held my hands n' i gave her a kiss on the lips at the end of the night. Tonight, i went n' picked her up a pink rose n' put it in my car before i picked her up from work. Then later on, we just sat in her bed hanging out. she once again wanted me to hold her hands so i did. Then couple seconds later, she's like "can i kiss you?" n' she just goes ahead n' kisses me lol. We end up kissing a couple times tonight. With all this shit going on, i remembered that i'm still going out with racheal. I am now officially a asshole. Then after i left, we did our thing n' i went online. she then says "i have a question, what are "we"?" i said "i can't decide what "we" are, but you being my gf wouldn't be a bad idea" she then goes on saying she would like to. so now...i have 2 gf's. I HAVE to dump one. Christina had a hard life n' all her bf's treated her n' her mom like complete shit. I wanted to change that for her n' show her that there is someone out there that cares about her. If i stay with christina, then i can't go to college in NH. if i dont stay with christina, then i go to college in NH n' stay with racheal, but the feeling between me n' racheal wouldn't be the same. How should i let racheal go, like what should i tell her?


I was almost in your exact situation. Except I asked a chick out while still dating my ex. We were together for about 2 years. I felt we were getting stronger, it was semi-long distance, and then i found out she was cheating on me...

Long distance relationships NEVER work out. If you're in a relationship, and the both of you move away, it won't work.
Just tell her over the phone that you're having an emotional break down, and can't keep calling her your girlfriend anymore, if you have the guts, or something to those.
Me? I couldn't do it. If Bec had said yes to my proposal to dating her, I would be in the situation you are in now.
But it tought me something. Never start a relationship when you're already in one.

i appreciate all of your responses. Good and bad ones lol. I think if I tell Racheal that i'm seeing another girl then that wont work out. I'm thinking bout just getting her pissed at me for not going up to NH this weekend and tell her that I'm tired of fighting .

Hogie's hornball side says:
what if you get both of them to meet? :naughty: j/k:p

but seriously....man that's messed up, but it's life. If you were ready to settle down with her then you would, but it seems like you two just grew apart really quick...and yeah that is messed up that you ended things like this, just as it's messed up for a woman to do the same thing to her significant other, but you just have to deal with it like Yogs and J_Swigz said, because it wouldn't be true to yourself or either of them.

oh yeah and out of context....

howdy neighbor :biggrin:

they don't have to know about each other.
Trust me, it's easy to just dump, than to tell her your cheating.

If she asks after you've dumped, tell her you met her a few weeks (months even) after you broke up.

yea, that's what i was thinking bout. I told my grandma first that I broke up with Racheal and i'm with another girl. She said she's happy that I did it so I can stay in CT lol.

When you are about 35-30 you can look back on this thread and say..."Hmmm, I was so upset because 2 girls wanted me". At that point you'll probably be tied down with a mortgage, a kid, a crappy full time job and a wife who's figure is slowly fading. Only then will you realize..and you will laugh- or cry...

Are you really willing to change things like where you are going to go to college based on what part of the country your girlfriend happens to live in? You're a young guy, and I don't think that a relationship should really outshine getting the education you want if you're really serious about it. But if you don't care then I guess it doesn't matter...

i dont care about what college i'm going to. i just want the education.

When you are about 35-30 you can look back on this thread and say..."Hmmm, I was so upset because 2 girls wanted me". At that point you'll probably be tied down with a mortgage, a kid, a crappy full time job and a wife who's figure is slowly fading. Only then will you realize..and you will laugh- or cry...

You forgot to add thinking about how retarded you were for thinking that other people's personal problems are your responsibility and making decisions that can degrade your personal happiness because of them.

Look,
I used to think just like you when I was your age. "I can't break up with her because she's been through...", I even had a girl threaten suicide when she was 16 because I wanted to break up.

(She's still alive by the way and quite happy with her husband and 2 kids now.)

Deciding to stay in a relationship because you fell "obligated" to is completely insane and doomed from the start. It takes two people for a relationship to work that are completely committed to eachother. "Hanging in there" may work for a while but it's not a solution. Ultimately you will be miserable and what then? You're right back where you are now. And what about this new chick? You obviously dig her.

I'm not going to lie to you. Being a man and telling a girl (or woman) that loves you that your heart isn't there and that you should part is VERY tough but it's worth it in the long run for the both of you. Lying to her and trying to piss her off so she'll break up with you, or give you an excuse to break up with her is chicken-shit, pathetic and wrong.

Coming from a woman who has had problems getting rid of a guy after breaking up with them. If you do it in you house you are stuck with the repairs. Break up in her house so she has to deal with any repairs. Just don't tell her about the other woman, unless you are wearing a cup. I have kicked guys there for cheating on me.

Hi all

none of u prolly know, but im going through a very hard break up with my gf that i was with for 2 years..... and man i tell u, DO NOT BE AN ASSHOLE. FORGET christina or whatever, and GO ON with racheal or whatrever man, just DONT hurt peples feelings man its so wrong its not worth it no one turns out happy man

the only person your playing is yourself dog

lateZ