5 Series (5258i) won't start (no turn)

With no prior history of not starting, today is not my day. I can't even open the trunk to check the battery. I tried testing the lights, windows, anything electronic and I get nothing. There is a quiet clicking under the dash (right side) , which is heard if something like a light or window is turned on. Is this a security glich or a dying battery? Isn't there a way to jump start from under the hood (engine compartment)? I need a little help here, dead in the water..
David

Can you open your trunk using your key? That should be possible even if the car has no juice.
The quiet click noise you mentioned sounds like a relay trying to fire, but not making it because there's not enough juice.
Get that trunk open and have your battery tested, or swap in your buddy's battery (that you know is good). Sometimes stuff rolling around in the trunk can short out a battery...although mine is under the hood, so I don't know what your car is really like.
I wouldn't do any jump-starting until you know what the problem is. If the car has a standard transmission, push-starting is an option (hope you got some friends!).
But even push-starting won't work if there's not enough juice for the computer to work to squirt fuel into the motor.
Flunky

I tried the key and it still won't open the trunk. It goes through the motion but it's like it's dissengaged. I learned also about a terminal location under the hood and perhaps I'll give it a boost to help open the trunk latch. Thanks 4 Door Flunky.