McDonalds vs US Air Force
TheNotoriousMogg
09-03-2003, 02:52 PM
>McDonald's vs Air Force
>
>Reasons why McDonald's is better...
>
>1. If you have to take a piss, you can go take a piss. No questions
>asked. 2. Better pay. 3. The boxes of food at McDonald's aren't stamped
>"Rejected by Hardee's" or "Not fit for human consumption".
>4. The ability to call in sick.
>5. The ability to quit.
>6. McDonald's doesn't get their uniforms from the same company as the state
>penitentiary.
>7. McDonald's doesn't deploy.
>8. They have actual janitors.
>9. No McExercises.
>10. The grill breaks, you CALL someone to fix it.
>11. At least your boss accepts that he's a clown.
>12. One word: overtime.
>13. At McDonald's, you will never, EVER, worry about being put in prison
>for
>ten years because you told your wife what the secret sauce is.
>14. They pay you for training.
>15. You'll never die a horrible, excruciating death from the fiery crash of
>a McDonald's.
>16. No time at McDonald's will you hear your boss give a thirty minute
>dissertation over the P.A. on the importance of being at the register 15
>minutes early.
>17. They won't ask you about Taco Bell operations on the advancement test.
>18. You get to leave work at the end of EVERY day
>19. McDonald's will eventually fire the really stupid employees.
>20. Two words: Happy Meals.
>21. No Watches
>22. McDonald's has a slide out back.
>23. To do something at McDonald's, you look at the color coded chart...not
>AFI umpty-squat, chapter whatever, reference 3, ACN B, rev 17.
>24. No Fod Walkdown
>25. Leaving McDonald's in an emergency doesn't require a command signature
>and a lot of praying.
>26. The coffee's better.
>27. Someone else makes the water.
>28. You don't have to live there to work there.
>29. Their TV commercials are a lot cooler.
>30. Stock in McDonald's is worth something. The Air Force is a part of an
>operation that is 6 trillion dollars in the hole.
>31. Special sauce isn't "hand made".
>32. Opening for business doesn't take a full day of preparations and
>require
>everyone to show up for a brief at 0230.
>33. Personnel inspection requirements are written on the door. (No shirt,
>no shoes, no service)
>34. At McDonald's, dislocating your shoulder is not considered getting the
>good deal.
>35. Because you deserve a break today.
>36. Mayor McCheese doesn't wield a righteous thumb of indignation.
>37. You can choose which McDonald's you want to work at.
>38. If you want to buy your boss a beer, that's okay.
>39. If you want to tell your boss to fuck off and just die fucking die,
>that's okay too.
>40. There is no Uniform Code of McDonald's Justice to deal with.
>41. No one will wake at 2 in the morning to start the grill.
>42. Chances of you getting called back after you get off work are pretty
>damn slim.
>43. Putting the pickle on the hamburger doesn't require a QA and a
>signature
>to be used against you in a court of law, should they want you.
>44. How many McDonald's were shot down in W.W.II?
>45. $2.99 is a meal price, not a daily wage at McDonald's.
>46. You don't have to go single register operations if someone spills a
>Coke.
>47. McDonald's doesn't call your house at 5:30 in the morning blaring some
>god-awful antiquated song about a bugler just to wake you up.
>48. No McThreatcon.
>49. At McDonald's, your boss will never make you drive him around for six
>months so he can spy on Wendy's.
>50. You don't have to come in to work at 7:00 only to wait around for an
>hour waiting for your boss to tell you things you already know.
>51. No McCAMS
>52. If you burn a hamburger they won't take away half a month's pay for two
>months and restrict you to the playground.
>53. Knowledge of the material of construction and variable operating
>characteristics of the grill are not prerequisites for operation.
>54. You don't have to take apart the shake machine once a quarter just
>because.
>55. You don't have to shave off your goatee.
>56. You scrub the floors because it's dirty, not because it's Wednesday.
>57. There is almost always plenty of parking. If not, drive through.
>58. Don't like what you got? Take it back.
>59. No 16 hour days at McDonald's prototype making burgers in the middle of
>the desert for no one.
>60. You don't have to have permission from the Manager, Assistant Manager,
>and Register Operator before going into the freezer.
>61. ALL of the articles of the Constitution apply to you at McDonald's.
>62. It's called "Happy Meal", not "Happy Hour".
>
>Reasons why McDonald's is better...
>
>1. If you have to take a piss, you can go take a piss. No questions
>asked. 2. Better pay. 3. The boxes of food at McDonald's aren't stamped
>"Rejected by Hardee's" or "Not fit for human consumption".
>4. The ability to call in sick.
>5. The ability to quit.
>6. McDonald's doesn't get their uniforms from the same company as the state
>penitentiary.
>7. McDonald's doesn't deploy.
>8. They have actual janitors.
>9. No McExercises.
>10. The grill breaks, you CALL someone to fix it.
>11. At least your boss accepts that he's a clown.
>12. One word: overtime.
>13. At McDonald's, you will never, EVER, worry about being put in prison
>for
>ten years because you told your wife what the secret sauce is.
>14. They pay you for training.
>15. You'll never die a horrible, excruciating death from the fiery crash of
>a McDonald's.
>16. No time at McDonald's will you hear your boss give a thirty minute
>dissertation over the P.A. on the importance of being at the register 15
>minutes early.
>17. They won't ask you about Taco Bell operations on the advancement test.
>18. You get to leave work at the end of EVERY day
>19. McDonald's will eventually fire the really stupid employees.
>20. Two words: Happy Meals.
>21. No Watches
>22. McDonald's has a slide out back.
>23. To do something at McDonald's, you look at the color coded chart...not
>AFI umpty-squat, chapter whatever, reference 3, ACN B, rev 17.
>24. No Fod Walkdown
>25. Leaving McDonald's in an emergency doesn't require a command signature
>and a lot of praying.
>26. The coffee's better.
>27. Someone else makes the water.
>28. You don't have to live there to work there.
>29. Their TV commercials are a lot cooler.
>30. Stock in McDonald's is worth something. The Air Force is a part of an
>operation that is 6 trillion dollars in the hole.
>31. Special sauce isn't "hand made".
>32. Opening for business doesn't take a full day of preparations and
>require
>everyone to show up for a brief at 0230.
>33. Personnel inspection requirements are written on the door. (No shirt,
>no shoes, no service)
>34. At McDonald's, dislocating your shoulder is not considered getting the
>good deal.
>35. Because you deserve a break today.
>36. Mayor McCheese doesn't wield a righteous thumb of indignation.
>37. You can choose which McDonald's you want to work at.
>38. If you want to buy your boss a beer, that's okay.
>39. If you want to tell your boss to fuck off and just die fucking die,
>that's okay too.
>40. There is no Uniform Code of McDonald's Justice to deal with.
>41. No one will wake at 2 in the morning to start the grill.
>42. Chances of you getting called back after you get off work are pretty
>damn slim.
>43. Putting the pickle on the hamburger doesn't require a QA and a
>signature
>to be used against you in a court of law, should they want you.
>44. How many McDonald's were shot down in W.W.II?
>45. $2.99 is a meal price, not a daily wage at McDonald's.
>46. You don't have to go single register operations if someone spills a
>Coke.
>47. McDonald's doesn't call your house at 5:30 in the morning blaring some
>god-awful antiquated song about a bugler just to wake you up.
>48. No McThreatcon.
>49. At McDonald's, your boss will never make you drive him around for six
>months so he can spy on Wendy's.
>50. You don't have to come in to work at 7:00 only to wait around for an
>hour waiting for your boss to tell you things you already know.
>51. No McCAMS
>52. If you burn a hamburger they won't take away half a month's pay for two
>months and restrict you to the playground.
>53. Knowledge of the material of construction and variable operating
>characteristics of the grill are not prerequisites for operation.
>54. You don't have to take apart the shake machine once a quarter just
>because.
>55. You don't have to shave off your goatee.
>56. You scrub the floors because it's dirty, not because it's Wednesday.
>57. There is almost always plenty of parking. If not, drive through.
>58. Don't like what you got? Take it back.
>59. No 16 hour days at McDonald's prototype making burgers in the middle of
>the desert for no one.
>60. You don't have to have permission from the Manager, Assistant Manager,
>and Register Operator before going into the freezer.
>61. ALL of the articles of the Constitution apply to you at McDonald's.
>62. It's called "Happy Meal", not "Happy Hour".
Hobbes
09-03-2003, 03:09 PM
So you quit the Air Force just to join a McDonalds, right? :tongue:
Good one.
Good one.
carrrnuttt
09-03-2003, 08:08 PM
AHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!
LOL
I dunno if non-USAF or non-Military will get this one, but DAMN, that's funny!
I forgot about those DAMNED FOD walks. You guys have ATSO-exercises where you're at? Don't forget WETSU! http://www.automotiveforums.com/vbulletin/images/smilies/lol.gif
It's even funnier for me, since I was part of a deployment unit, I was on exercise almost every 2 weeks for a while, for up to 4 weeks...think about that...LOL.
LOL
I dunno if non-USAF or non-Military will get this one, but DAMN, that's funny!
I forgot about those DAMNED FOD walks. You guys have ATSO-exercises where you're at? Don't forget WETSU! http://www.automotiveforums.com/vbulletin/images/smilies/lol.gif
It's even funnier for me, since I was part of a deployment unit, I was on exercise almost every 2 weeks for a while, for up to 4 weeks...think about that...LOL.
TheNotoriousMogg
09-04-2003, 12:41 AM
Yeah we do ATSO they are so fuckin gay...last time we went to MOPP 4 I was under my desk and they forgot to tell me, I was alseep my boss the commander had to come in and he was like "darrell....darrell...you alive?" I was like yeah boss sweatin my ass off...they left me there for 45 mins after we went to MOPP 2
carrrnuttt
09-04-2003, 01:08 AM
Yeah we do ATSO they are so fuckin gay...last time we went to MOPP 4 I was under my desk and they forgot to tell me, I was alseep my boss the commander had to come in and he was like "darrell....darrell...you alive?" I was like yeah boss sweatin my ass off...they left me there for 45 mins after we went to MOPP 2
LOL.
Tell you what...you haven't lived until you've experienced MOPP-4 for 15-hours straight in 120-degree-weather. Whenever we had to duck in the bunker for cover, it was about 150 degrees inside the hardened tent, easy.
LOL.
Tell you what...you haven't lived until you've experienced MOPP-4 for 15-hours straight in 120-degree-weather. Whenever we had to duck in the bunker for cover, it was about 150 degrees inside the hardened tent, easy.
TheNotoriousMogg
09-04-2003, 02:00 AM
LOL.
Tell you what...you haven't lived until you've experienced MOPP-4 for 15-hours straight in 120-degree-weather. Whenever we had to duck in the bunker for cover, it was about 150 degrees inside the hardened tent, easy.
sure I have, I was in kuwait
Tell you what...you haven't lived until you've experienced MOPP-4 for 15-hours straight in 120-degree-weather. Whenever we had to duck in the bunker for cover, it was about 150 degrees inside the hardened tent, easy.
sure I have, I was in kuwait
zebrathree
09-04-2003, 02:03 AM
Two Air Force (!) guys talking about how tough they are doesnt really work guys. :grinyes: :biggrin:
slave
09-04-2003, 02:20 AM
Two Air Force (!) guys talking about how tough they are doesnt really work guys. :grinyes: :biggrin:
So how about 3?? Never done the shit you boys are talking about, but have done the odd 24 hour shift, lets just say once you wake up from the sleep the next day, you bust some heads for people forcing you to do it.
So how about 3?? Never done the shit you boys are talking about, but have done the odd 24 hour shift, lets just say once you wake up from the sleep the next day, you bust some heads for people forcing you to do it.
YogsVR4
09-04-2003, 11:33 AM
Good one :lol:
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slave
09-04-2003, 11:35 AM
Lol, the food is better at McDonalds!!! At least it doesn't give me as much wind as the food in my mess does. Its awful. :bloated:
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