2001 overstarts

I have a 2001 that when I start it, sometimes the starter doesn't disengage quick enough and it grinds on the flywheel. It mainly happens when its cold or if the a/c compressor is left engaged. Could the relay be causing this or do I need to replace the starter?

More likely it would be better to inspect the start enable relay to see if the contacts are welding/sticking. If that is intact, move on to the starter.