Cop Jokes

Anybody know any good ones? Here's one for starters:
State Trooper stops a SYT (Sweet Young Thing), with one in the passenger seat, and asks for her license. Turning on her charm and a radiant smile, the SYT says, "Officer, I know I was speeding, but if you'll let me off with a verbal warning, I'll buy some tickets to the Troopers Ball."

Trooper says, "Troopers don't have balls, ma'm."

Dead silence for 5 seconds.

Trooper shakes his head, hands license back to the SYT, and walks back to his car and drives off.

Here's another one:

A guy has been chased by a cop for a while along a winding but deserted stretch in the middle of the night. He finally decided that he is not getting away and pulled over. The cop, a little impressed with the guy's driving, promised to give the guy a break if he can come up with a good excuse.
The execuse was: My wife ran away with a cop last week. I thought you are bringing her back.

He got away.



Ok now, let's do it guys.
Just go on the web and search out the cop jokes, then post em here. It will be fun :smoker2:

LOL thats funny as shit :p

Funny stuff :rolleyes:

here's some more.


Ten Signs Your Partner Needs A Vacation


10. Every Tuesday he insists it's his turn to be the siren.
9. He is starting to develop a crush on one of the transvestite hookers he arrested.
8. He wants to transfer to a K-9 unit because he thinks he'd look good in a collar.
7. He wants you to call him "Judge Dredd", and he insists that all suspects should be executed right there on the spot.
6. He talk to himself. Half of him is the "good cop", and the other half is the "bad cop".
5. He keeps asking you if his bullet proof vest makes him look fat.
4. He is exchanging donut recipes with complete strangers.
3. The perpetrators beg him to stop talking about his hemorrhoids.
2. He wants to hear less talk and more music on the police channel.
1. He keeps handcuffing himself by accident!!





The Helpful Wife


A male driver is pulled over by a cop and the following conversation takes place:
Man: What's the problem officer?
Cop: You were going at least 75 in a 55 zone.
Man: No sir, I was going 65.
Wife: Oh Harry. You were going 80.
(Man gives his wife a dirty look.)
Cop: I'm also going to give you a ticket for your broken tail light.
Man: Broken tail light? I didn't know about a broken tail light!
Wife: Oh Harry, you've known about that tail light for weeks.
(Man gives his wife a dirty look.)
Cop: I'm also going to give you a citation for not wearing your seat belt.
Man: Oh, I just took it off when you were walking up to the car.
Wife: Oh Harry, you never wear your seat belt.
Man: Shut your mouth, woman!
Cop: Ma'am, does your husband always talk to you this way?
Wife: No, only when he's drunk.







In Hot Pursuit

Two girlfriends were speeding down the highway at well over a 100 miles per hour.
"Hey," asked the brunette at the wheel, "see any cops following us?"
The blonde turned around for a long look. "As a matter of fact, I do."
"Oh, NOOOO!" yelled the brunette. "Are his flashers on?"
The blonde turned around again. "Yup...nope...yup...nope...yup..."



this is nuff for now. :cool:

LOL :sun:

The last one is especially good :D

Now this is ridiculous you guys :flipa:

Where is everyone??? :mad:

Post some jokes.. comon.

The last one was funny. :flipa:

There was one guy from car forums who had a cool signature. It went something like this:

Cop: Do you know how fast you were doing back there?
Me: No, my speedometer stops at 120.


I thought it was a cool one:)

Shit. Hell yeah, I like to joke around. Anything so that I can get outta a ticket. Except maybe anything sexual... lol

:D :D like the blonde one :D :D

In the spirit of ripping jokes off the net....

A cop on horseback is at a traffic light and next to him is a kid on his bike.
The cop smiles and says to the kid, "Nice bike you got there. Santa bring that to you?"
The kid looks up and says, "Yeah."
The cop says, "Tell Santa next year to put a taillight on that bike."
The kid says, "Nice horse you got there. Did Santa bring that to you?"
The cop smiles and continues his light-heartedness, "Sure did."
The kid says, "Well, tell Santa next year to put the dick underneath the horse, instead of on top."

Here go a few amusing ones I found.

Speed Trap?
Item in Berwickshire Gazette - November 11th 1998

A report has revealed that two traffic patrol officers from North Berwick were involved in an unusual incident whilst checking for speeding motorists on the A1 road between Oldhamstocks and Grantshouse.

Last May, they were using a hand-held radar device to trap unwary motorists on the Edinburgh to London trunk road. One of the unnamed officers used the device to check the speed of an approaching vehicle, and was surprised to find that his target had registered a speed in excess of 300 miles per hour.

The #5000 machine then seized up and could not be reset by the bemused PC's. The radar had in fact latched on to a NATO Tornado aircraft in the North Sea, which was taking part in a simulated low-flying exercise over the Borders and Southern Scotland.

Following a complaint by Sir William Sutherland, Chief Constable of the Lothian & Borders Police force to the RAF liaison office, it was revealed that the officers had a lucky escape - the tactical computer on board the aircraft not only detected and jammed the "hostile" radar equipment, but had automatically armed a Maverick air-to-ground missile ready to neutralise the perceived threat. Luckily the Dutch pilot was alerted to the missile status and was able to override the automatic protection system before the missile launched.



Speeding Ticket

A judge had just fined a man $25 for speeding. When the judge gave the man the receipt, the man yelled sarcastically, 'What am I supposed to do with this...frame it?!?!?!' The judge replied, 'No, keep it, when you get three you get a bicycle.'

Stopped for speeding

The car was pulled over by a highway patrolwoman for speeding.

As the officer was writing the ticket, she noticed several machetes in the car. "What are those for?" she asked suspiciously.

"I'm a juggler," the man replied. "I use those in my act."

"Well, show me," the officer demanded.

The juggler took out the machetes and started juggling them; first three, then more until he was tossing seven at one time, overhand, underhand, behind the back, putting on a dazzling show in the breakdown lane and amazing the officer.

Just then, another car passed by. The driver did a double take, and said, "My God. I've got to give up drinking! Look at the test they're giving now."

OH NO! That last one was so lame it was funny!

Originally posted by YogsVR4
OH NO! That last one was so lame it was funny!


I thought so too, which is why I had to put it in.:D

okay guys this one is a bit shitty,,,,,

NASTIE OFFICER

A man is driving along a road when he comes to a stop sign..... he decides not to stop and proceedes slowly with caution... as he gets through, out of no-where he see's red n blue lights flashing, he thinks to himself F*ck! and pulls the car over..... the officer comes to the car and says to the man "u didnt stop at the stop back there" the man replies "officer please i slowed down..." the officer pulls out his club and starts to vigourusly beat the man over the head with it, after a fair flogging the officer then says to the man "now would you preffer me to STOP or slow down!?!" :silly2:


ta daa.....

That one was pretty good. :D

cop pulls over this dude in a BMW and asks him for his licence.As he's reading it he notices the endosement"Driver must wear correcting lenses at all times"He looks up at the driver and sees no glasses.Now our friendly local plod has a chip on his shoulder about BMW'S and he decides he's going to ticket this dude.He tells the driver that he's getting a ticket,and the driver replies"but officer,I've got contacts"
the cop replies"I don't care who you know, you're gettin ' a ticket.....

Stop or slow down, now dat was funny:D :D

hahahahahahahahahahahhaahaha, these r sooooooooo damn funny i dont have any sorry but they r reaLLLY funny

LOL, that sum funny shit!:bandit: :smoka: :smoker2: :flipa: :badass:

Well damn, I'm almost 18 now and me and my buddies are really into cars but we all have the same problem that none of our cars are nice enough to get into. So we just kind of make shift with what we've got. So one day my friend Steve who drive a 1995 Grand Am (Not even the V6 or GT) is cruisin' down Irma where the speed limit is a unbelieveable 35 on a 5 lane wide road. Well Steve notices that a car nice and luxurious lookin' is gaining speed up on his right side... Steve is probably doin' about 38 to 40. Steve says like always, "This guy thinks he's better than me" as he floors it and starts pickin' up speed slowly, well the ride next to him does the same and here we have our own little street race goin' on at about 70 MPH in a 35 zone. Finally he sees the other car start to give up some, and signal to switch lanes in behind him... Steve figuring that he's goin' to take a left hand turn at the approching light... But while still stairing in his rear view mirror to see if the guy is goin' to ride his ass or not, suddenly lights come on, the car was an un-marked police car. From this point on, Steve was a little scimpy on details about the story except for the fact that the cop was laughing to hard to write my friend a citation. :sun:

this is a true story i read sum where


a guy was havin a few drinks at the pub and wen he was finished he went to his car and drove home. along the way he saw a booze bus infront of him and the oficer was waving him in so the man knowing he was drunk waves back and turns right on the road before the booze bus. as soon as he got home he called up all his mates and told the "if ne 1 asks i was at home all day" and he went to sleep.
the next week he went to the same pub and an oficer confrunted him and said"feeling a bit giulty last week were we??"

Originally posted by R32's Kick ass
this is a true story i read sum where


a guy was havin a few drinks at the pub and wen he was finished he went to his car and drove home. along the way he saw a booze bus infront of him and the oficer was waving him in so the man knowing he was drunk waves back and turns right on the road before the booze bus. as soon as he got home he called up all his mates and told the "if ne 1 asks i was at home all day" and he went to sleep.
the next week he went to the same pub and an oficer confrunted him and said"feeling a bit giulty last week were we??"

I don't get it...

Caught for speeding

The cop got out of his car and the kid, that was stopped for speeding,
rolled down his window.
"I've been waiting for you all day," the cop said.
The kid replied, "Yeah, well I got here as fast as I could."
When the cop finally stopped laughing, he sent the kid on his way without
a ticket.

+++++++++++

Stuck under a bridge

A truck driver was driving along on
the freeway. A sign comes up that reads
"low bridge ahead." Before he knows it
the bridge is right ahead of him and
he gets stuck under the bridge. Cars are
backed up for miles. Finally, a police car
comes up. The cop gets out of his car and
walks around to the truck driver, puts his
hands on his hips and says, "Got stuck, huh?"
The truck driver says, "No, I was delivering
this bridge and ran out of gas."

++++++++++++

Drunk?

The drunken wino was stumbling down
the street with one foot on the curb and one
foot in the gutter. A cop pulled up and
said, "I've got to take you in, sir. You're
obviously drunk". The wasted wino asked,
"Ociffer, are ya absolutely sure I'm drunk?"
"Yeah, buddy, I'm sure," said the copper.
"Let's go." Obviously relieved, the wino
said "That's a relief - I thought I was a
cripple."

++++++++++++++

Dealing with trouble A deputy police officer
responded to a report of a barroom
disturbance. The "disturbance" turned out to
be well over six feet tall and weighed almost
300 pounds. What's more, he boasted that he
could whip the deputy and Muhammad Ali too.
Said the policeman, "I'll bet that you're
also an escape artist-probably better than
Houdini." "If I had some chains," the deputy
continued, "you could show us how strong you
really are. But all I've got is a set of
handcuffs. Why don't you see just how
quickly you can break out of them?" Once in
the cuffs, the man puffed, pulled and jerked
for four minutes. "I can't get out of
these," the giant growled. "Are you sure?"
the deputy asked. The fellow tried again.
"Nope," he replied. "I can't do it." "In
that case," said the deputy, "you're under
arrest."

+++++++++++++

Too Late

The man was in no shape to drive, so
he wisely left his car parked and walked
home. As he was walking unsteadily along, he
was stopped by a policeman. "What are you
doing out here at 2 A.M.?" asked the
officer. "I'm going to a lecture." The man
said. "And who is going to give a lecture at
this hour?" the cop asked. "My wife," said
the man.

some of the jokes are funny bus some arent so continue bringing more.:)

A cop pulls over a guy.
"Your eyes are awfully red. Have you been drinking?"
"Gee, officer," the man says. "Your eyes are awfully glazed -- have you been eating doughnuts?"


----------------------------------

A police officer pulled over a driver and informed him that because he was wearing his seat belt, he had just won $5,000 in a safety competition!
"What are you going to do with the prize money?" the officer asked.
The man responded, "I guess I'll go to driving school and get my license."
At that moment, his wife, who was seated next to him, chimed in, "Officer, don't listen to him. He's a smart aleck when he's drunk."
This woke up the guy in the back seat, who, when he saw the cop, blurted out, "I knew we wouldn't get far in this stolen car."
At that moment, there was a knock from the trunk and a voice yelled, "Are we over the border yet?"

A police officer pulled over a driver and informed him that because he was wearing his seat belt, he had just won $5,000 in a safety competition!
"What are you going to do with the prize money?" the officer asked.
The man responded, "I guess I'll go to driving school and get my license."
At that moment, his wife, who was seated next to him, chimed in, "Officer, don't listen to him. He's a smart aleck when he's drunk."
This woke up the guy in the back seat, who, when he saw the cop, blurted out, "I knew we wouldn't get far in this stolen car."
At that moment, there was a knock from the trunk and a voice yelled, "Are we over the border yet?"

BIG trouble. lol keep 'em coming

This actually happened on route 81 in PA with my dad in the passenger seat. My dad's friend said-
''What do you mean I was speeding officer, the sign said 81''
My dad said that cops don't have a sense of humor...

---DUI-----
One night a police officer was staking out a particularly rowdy bar for possible DUI violations. At closing time, he saw a fellow stumble out of the bar, trip on the curb and try his keys on several different cars before he found his, and took an additional 15 minutes to unlock his car. The man sat in the front seat fumbling around with his keys for several more minutes.
Meanwhile, all the other patrons left the bar and drove off. Finally he started his engine and began to pull away. The police officer was waiting for him. As soon as the man pulled onto the street, the officer stopped him, read him his rights and administered the breathalyzer test to determine his blood-alcohol content.
The results showed a reading of 0.0.
The puzzled gave him two more breathalyzers, both the the same effect. The confused officer asked how it could be. The driver replied, "Tonight I'm the designated decoy."

---Crafty Rabbi----
A Rabbi and a Priest are driving one day and, by a freak accident, have a head-on collision with tremendous force. Both cars are totally demolished, but amazingly, neither of the clerics has a scratch on him.
After they crawl out of their cars, the rabbi sees the priest's collar and says, "So you're a priest. I'm a rabbi.
Just look at our cars.
There is nothing left, yet we are here, unhurt.
This must be a sign from God!"
Pointing to the sky, he continues, "God must have meant that we should meet and share our lives in peace and friendship for the rest of our days on earth."
The priest replies, "I agree with you completely.
This must surely be a sign from God!"
The rabbi is looking at his car and exclaims, "And look at this!
Here's another miracle!
My car is completely demolished, but this bottle of Mogen David wine did not break.
Surely, God wants us to drink this wine and to celebrate our good fortune."
The priest nods in agreement.
The rabbi hands the bottle to the priest, who drinks half the bottle and hands the bottle back to the rabbi.
The rabbi takes the bottle and immediately puts the cap on, then hands it back to the priest.
The priest, baffled, asks, "Aren't you having any, Rabbi?"
The rabbi replies, "Nah... I think I'll wait for the police."

---LAPD----
The Los Angeles Police Department (LAPD), The FBI, and the CIA are all trying to prove that they are the best at apprehending criminals. The President decides to give them a test. He releases a rabbit into a forest and each of them has to catch it.

The CIA goes in.
They place animal informants throughout the forest.
They question all plant and mineral witnesses.
After three months of extensive investigations they conclude that rabbits do not exist.

The FBI goes in.
After two weeks with no leads they burn the forest, killing everything in it, including the rabbit, and they make no apologies.
The rabbit had it coming.

The LAPD goes in.
They come out two hours later with a badly beaten bear.
The bear is yelling: "Okay! Okay! I'm a rabbit! I'm a rabbit!"

-Atempting the Impossible---
A police officer pulls over this guy who had been weaving in and out of the lanes.
He goes up to the guy's window and says, "Sir, I need you to blow into this breathalyzer tube."
The man says, "Sorry officer I can't do that. I am an asthmatic. If I do that I'll have a really bad asthma attack."
"Okay, fine. I need you to come down to the station to give a blood sample." "I can't do that either. I am a hemophiliac. If I do that, I'll bleed to death."
"Well, then we need a urine sample."
"I'm sorry officer I can't do that either. I am also a diabetic. If I do that I'll get really low blood sugar."
"Alright then I need you to come out here and walk this white line."
"I can't do that, officer."
"Why not?"
"Because I'm too drunk to do that."

---Donations-----
Traffic was backed up for miles, the police were going car to car. When they got to my car I asked the officer what was going on.
He said "It's O.J. again. He's up there threatening to set himself on fire! We are going car to car collecting donations."
"Donations!" I said, "How much you got so far?"
He said "about ten gallons."

-Pigs That Fly---
A man was recently flying to New York. He decided to strike up a conversation with his seat mate.
"I've got a great policeman joke. Would you like to hear it?"
"I should let you know first that I am a policeman."
"That's OK. I'll tell it really slow!"

-Come again?---
A police officer pulls over an elderly female for speeding while driving her husband to a doctors appointment. The officer approaches the vehicle and attempts to explain that he stopped her for speeding.
She looks at her husband and asks, "What did he say?"
The husband replies, "He said he stopped you for speeding."
The officer asked the elderly female for her driver's license and she turned and asked her husband, "What did he say?
The husband replies, "he wants to see your driver's license."
The women hands the officer her license and he sees that she is from his old home town. The officer tells the couple that he remembered the town because he had the worst sexual experience of his life there.
The women looks at her husband and asked, "What did he say?"
The husband replies, "He says he knows you."

-Tens signs the chief hates you---

10. He sends you on drug raids....alone.
9. He refers to you as "Our Little Mascot."
8. The job description in your contract includes "crash test dummy" and "pepper-spray test subject."
7. Instead of a gun, you were issued a water pistol.
6. He always tells you that only wussies call for back-up.
5. He lied to you about an "officer exchange program" and put you on a plane to Siberia.
4. He doesn't like to be seen with you in public.
3. He makes up "missing persons" and then sends you to look for them.
2. You always get the patrol car with the flat tire, no gas, a dead battery, and a broken air conditioner.
1. Your locker is also the broom closet!!

-Could've written BLVD---
A trooper is taking notes on a car crash that led to several body pieces spred throughout the street. He sees a head on the street, and writes "head on boulivard" scratches it out and writes "head on boolevard" scratches it out, takes a look around, then kicks the head. "head found on curb"

-Rectum Strecher---
Bob was driving home over the Golden Gate Bridge after spending a great day out on the ocean fishing. His catch, cleaned and filleted, was wrapped in newspaper on the passenger side floor. He was late getting home and was speeding. Wouldn't you know it, a cop jumped out, radar gun in hand, motioned him to the side of the bridge. Bob pulled over like a good citizen.
The cop walked up to the window and said, "You know how fast you were going, BOY?"
Bob thought for a second and said, "Uhh, 35?"
"SIXTY-SEVEN mph, son!" 67 mph in a 55 zone!" said the cop.
"But if you already knew, officer" replied Bob, "Why did you ask me?"
Fuming over Bob's answer, the officer growled, in his normal sarcastic fashion, "That's speeding, and you're getting a ticket and a fine!" The cop took a good close look at Bob, in his stained fishing attire and said, "You don't even look like you have a job! Why, I've never seen anyone so scruffy in my entire life!"
Bob answered, "I've got a job! I have a good, well-paying job!"
The cop leaned in the window, smelling Bob's fish catch, said, "What kind of a job would a bum like you have?"
"I'm a rectum stretcher!" replied Bob.
"What you say, BOY?" asked the patrolman.
"I'm a rectum stretcher!"
The cop, scratching his head, asked, "What does a rectum stretcher do?"
Bob explained, "People call me up and say they need to be stretched, so I go over to their house. I start with a couple of fingers, then a couple more and then one whole hand, then two. Then I slowly pull them farther and farther apart until it's a full six feet across."
The cop, absorbed with these bizarre images in his mind, asked, "What the heck do you do with a six foot @$$hole?"
Bob nonchalantly answered, "You give it a radar gun and stick it at the end of a bridge!"

-Spell that for me?---
A traffic Policeman recently stopped a woman for exceeding the posted speed limit. He asked the driver her name.
She said, "I'm Mrs. Chadivaler Zuminskagia Ragretumunga from the Republic of Uzbetikan visiting my daughter in Columbia."
As she finished speaking the cop paused for a moment and then put away his summons book and pen, and said, "Well... OK... but don't let me catch you speeding again."

-Blonde 911 call---
A blonde phoned police to report that thieves had been in her car. "They've stolen the dashboard, the steering wheel, the brake pedal, even the accelerator," she cried out.
However, before the police investigation could start, the phone rang a second time and the same voice came over the line. "Never mind, I got in the back seat by mistake."

This one's so old, but surely a few haven't heard it yet:

Q: What's the last thing to go through a bug's mind when it hits your windshield?

A: His axxhole.

Yeah, I know. :rolleyes:

Well, if you can't tell, I've got a bunch of them

-When ya gotta go...----
A woman was driving down the highway about 75 miles an hour, when she noticed a motorcycle policeman following her. Instead of slowing down, she picked up speed. When she looked back again, their were two motorcycles following her. She shot up to 90 miles. The next time she looked around, there were three cops following her. Suddenly, she spotted a gas station looming ahead. She screeched to a stop and ran into the lady's room.
Ten minutes later, she innocently walked out. The three cops were standing their waiting for her. Without batting an eye, she said coyly, "I'll bet none of you thought I would make it."

---FBI Test------------
Three men were trying out for the FBI.
The testing agent approached the three men with a gun. He pointed to a door and said, "We have all your wives in that room over there. For you to make it into the FBI, you must each take this gun and shoot your wife."
The first man took the gun, walked boldly into the room, and shut the door. The others listened for gunshots, but heard nothing. A while later, the man came out of the room, crying, "I can't shoot my wife. I love her!"
The second man took the gun, walked boldly into the room, and shut the door behind him. The others again listened for gunshots, but again heard only silence. The man came out, bawling, and said, "I can't shoot my wife! She cooks so well, and I love her so much!"
The third man said, "Gimme the danged gun." He snatched the weapon, and marched in the room. It took no time at all to hear: BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG!
That was followed by all sorts of banging noise, screams, and then finally cold silence.
The man emerged from the room, sweating profusely, and barked, "You didn't tell me the gun was loaded with blanks! So I had to beat her to death with a chair."

--Irshman-------------
An Irishman walks out of a pub, stumbling back and forth with a key in his hand.
A cop on the beat sees him and approaches, "Can I help you lad?"
"Yes, sssshombody stole me car!" the Irishman replies.
The cop asks, "Well now, where was your car the last time you saw it?"
"It was at the end of this key."
About this time the cop happens to notice that the Irishman's member is being exhibited for all to see. He then asks, "Are you aware that you are exposing yourself, sir?"
The Irishman looks down woefully and moans "Oh, gosh me golly, they stole me girlfriend, too!!"

---How police dogs came to be----
A drunk takes his dog for a walk. After awhile he gets thirsty so he ties his dog to a parking meter in front of a bar and goes in for a couple of beers.
After he has been there for an hour or so the local policeman enters the bar,"Whose dog is tied up out front?"
The drunk responds, "That's my dog. Is there a problem officer?"
"Well she's in heat," says the cop."
"Oh, she'll be all right. It's shady out there."
"That's not what I mean. Your dog needs to be bred."
"I gave her a half of a loaf this morning. She's fine."
At this point the policeman is becoming a little upset. "Listen buddy! You don't seem to understand what I am talking about. That dog wants to mate."
"Oh, go right ahead officer, I've always wanted a police dog."

--Free Service--------
Policeman: "I'm afraid that I'm going to have to lock you up for the night."
Man: "What's the charge officer?"
Policeman: "Oh, there's no charge. It's all part of the service.

---Quickies------------
How does the LAPD play poker?
Four clubs beat a king.
---
A cop pulls a guy over for weaving across two lanes of traffic.
He walks up to the drivers window and asks, "You drinkin'?"
The driver said, "You buyin'?"
---
Two Alabama State Troopers were chasing a Camaro East on I-20 toward Georgia. When the suspect crossed the Georgia line, the first Trooper pulled over quickly.
The rookie Trooper pulled in behind him and said, "Hey, sarge, why did you stop?"
The sarge replied, "He's in Georgia now. They're an hour ahead of us, so we'll never catch him."
---
A lawyer opened the door of his BMW, when suddenly a car came along and hit the door, ripping it off completely.
When the police arrived at the scene, the lawyer was complaining bitterly about the damage to his precious BMW.
"Officer, look what they've done to my Beeeeemer!!!", he whined.
"You lawyers are so materialistic, you make me sick!!!", retorted the officer. "You're so worried about your stupid BMW, that you didn't even notice that your left arm was ripped off!"
"Oh my gaaaad...", replied the lawyer, finally noticing the bloody left shoulder where his arm once was.
"Where's my Rolex???!!!"
---
A police officer stops a blonde for speeding and asks her very nicely if he could see her license.
She replied in a huff, "I wish you guys would get your act together. Just yesterday you take away my license and then today you expect me to show it to you!"

LOL Cameron1319
I like your sig too :lol:

funny...very funny..

laughing my ass off....keep em comming :lol: :lol: :lol2:

http://www.classiczcars.com/forums/attachment.php?s=&postid=68696
pulled this from another site

What does "doughnuts" means?

Doughnuts=

http://trianide.com/images/photography/donuts.jpg


That FBI one was a riot! Keep em coming!

those are hilarious. i wish i could remember them all so i could tell people. do keep them coming.

How about a true story.

A couple of years ago I was buzzing down a rural interstate when I spotted a state trooper's car hid in a pasture next to the road. About 50 yards past the car, I saw the trooper with his hand held radar gun - being chased by a pissed-off bull. Wish I'd a had a video camera!!

Regards:
Oldengineer

lmao thats some funny shit

How about a true story.

A couple of years ago I was buzzing down a rural interstate when I spotted a state trooper's car hid in a pasture next to the road. About 50 yards past the car, I saw the trooper with his hand held radar gun - being chased by a pissed-off bull. Wish I'd a had a video camera!!

Regards:
Oldengineer
:rofl: :rofl: :rofl:

Doughnuts=

http://trianide.com/images/photography/donuts.jpg


That FBI one was a riot! Keep em coming!
I know what is a doughnut. But what does that mean? Does it mean something else?

I know what is a doughnut. But what does that mean? Does it mean something else?

have you ever heard of how cops love doughnuts. its some myth thingy that started a long time ago that all cops love to eat doughnuts.

p.s. those are some disgusting looking doughnuts.

have you ever heard of how cops love doughnuts. its some myth thingy that started a long time ago that all cops love to eat doughnuts.

p.s. those are some disgusting looking doughnuts.
So is it like teasing then?

(Post #35)
" Insurance and registration please. "

" Uh, sure no problem....you're not gonna check the trunk are you?"

__________________________________________________ _________

Quote:
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One day, i'm gonna run a stop sign when it's pouring rain out, just to make the cop get out of his car and stand there in a huge puddle and get soaked while writing me up.

Why make the money if you can't enjoy spending it right?

" Alright you, do ya know why i pulled you over? "

" Yeah! Do you know why i ran the sign? "
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By Drew Carey.




I can't get enough of this stuff.