argh, girls r confusing

Yup, so, last nite, had a lil party get together thing at my house. A girl, who I actually really like, was there. I told her before how I felt, when she had a bf, and that I would never act on it because i respected that she had a good bf. So, that was fine, we kept getting closer neway. Last week and half ago, her bf broke up with her. I was the guy she really cryed about it to; even though she *knows* that i still like her that way. Anyway, I wasnt going to make a move yet, i mean, she was really upset. But, she was over last night with 2 of her friends.
Anyway, we were all drinking. And she ended up making out with my friend, Mr. D he will be called. Doing it right in front of everyone, sittin on the edge of the couch. Thankfully, her friend came and sat between me and her, im glad they werent right in my face. As soon as the pizza got there, i got those 3 to leave, which the 2 of them knew was a good idea.
So, I of course sent an email right then, even though I was pretty intoxicated. She tried talking to me for a minute, telling me she doesnt want me to hate her, that she made a mistake.
Well, couldnt talk then, and shes not online today so far.

I just dont understand it at all; We *both* opened up to each other, and I had made it clear that I did like her, but wouldnt try and force nething. I mean, I actually start to fucking care about someonen, then, get stomped on. Why the fuck does shit like this happen?

Basically, does anyone have any idea why she would do this? If I never had a chance, the least she could do is tell me, ferchristsakes.

because dude , it never works that way , happened to me a couple of times. If they want you after they lose a b/f you will know , if they dont immediately take off with you just leave it alone. Girls love backup guys , thats what she seems to have made you. Ive been used as that before and it sucks. I found its best to get away from it. As soon as I stopped that habit I met the most wonderful girl in the last place I'd ever look and its worked out great . Just hang in there man . If she wants you she will let you know. I do have to take into account that she was drinking and sometimes your attention span shrinks when youve been drinking , she might have forgot you were there. Which isnt really very comforting anyhow

no offence nice girls!! dog sometimes girls just do fucked up shit !
she knows that u like her so she thinks she already got u on back-up
(i know some shady bitches like that)or its cause she just broke up with her bf that tends to make people do stoopid things or maybe she was just drunk. could be alot of things!
i hope u get it worked out!!!

Chris, the EXACT same thing happened to me last night, and i feel like shit today because of it (and not because of the hangover).

we had a huge tent-kegger in a field near my house, and me and this girl went together. i've been flirting and hanging out with her at school and out of school alot lately, looking for the perfect time to make a move. i told her i liked her, and she indirectly hinted that she liked me too. since she didn't have a tent of her own, i offered that she sleep in mine, and she agreed, so i figured last night would be the perfect night to make a move. well, we get there, we're super-close for the first 2 hours or so, and i think everything is going fine. then she get's hammered. we were still close, but at one point in the night, i left her side for all of 10 minutes, come back, and her and one of my friends are making out. for the rest of the night, they're inseperable, and always doing their shit RIGHT beside me. she comes into my tent this morning to get her shit. she didn't even sleep in my tent. probably spent the night fucking that other guy. i don't have a hangover (even though i got pretty drunk), but i still feel like i'm going to vomit because i'm so fucking pissed off that she KNEW that i liked her, and still went off and did this, and ALSO pissed that my other friend, who knew that i liked her, let this happen.

Guys do the same kind of crap... only they don't cry about break-ups usually. Don't sweat it... you like her too much to be the rebound anyway.

Originally posted by BigJustinZ28
I do have to take into account that she was drinking and sometimes your attention span shrinks when youve been drinking , she might have forgot you were there. Which isnt really very comforting anyhow

well then he'd have to be around her 24/7 to keep her from cheating if she cant even remember that hes around...

She eventually came online, lots of talking about it, both said some kinda mean things, but tried to retract them pretty much as soon as the words were sent. Well, I felt like shit at work monday, but I had a while to think about it. Made for a very shitty day. But, one guy said something about my friend, thinking that he knew i liked her; he said, "bros before hoes". Well, I thought about it, and she was my friend first. So, I wrote another email, saying that I do want us to still be as good friends as we were before. We talked about it a bit more today. Got her to just come out and say she doesnt like me 'that way'. Really kinda sucks to hear that straight up, but, its better then doubt. Looks like I got caught in the dreaded 'friend' category. She was geneuinly sorry about the fact that she had hurt me, though, which is good I guess. She said that she made a mistake, and wasnt planning to even search out my friend again. She was actually kinda scared that I might hate her (I dont have it in me to really hate anyone :rolleyes: ), so, I know we are still 'good;. Actually, things started to return to 'normal', but Im still not anywhere near normal. I still cant really understand why she would just make out with a random guy; i actually helped her through some hard times, and would do anything for her. The old saying, "just because someone doesnt love you the way you love them, doesnt mean them they love you as much as they know how" doesnt really help. Whatever happened to friends with benefits; sometimes just being with someone with whom there is mutual respect can really help.
Argh, women sure are confusing; Even though I know that we would be a great match (today, I said that I just can talk to her so easily, and thats hard to find, and she said it back, so, :confused: )

Does anyone out there have any ideas as to my chances of *ever* having a shot with her, or should I just try and totally forget it, cuz I just have no chance?

Either way, Im glad things are finally cleared up, and that we can still be great friends.

sorry to co-post in your thread Chris, but i've gotta update my sitch too for those that care.

i talked to her today, and found out, MUCH MUCH to my relief, that NOTHING happened between her and my friend. i also heard it from him, and from 3 other people who can attest to the fact that she was up all night with them at the party, sitting around the fire. she said she never even kissed the guy, and the thought never even crossed her mind. i can't really understand why she was hanging around with him so much if that's the case...but i'm still REALLY relieved. as for my "chances" with her, she explained to me that she just recently ended an 11 month relationship in which she says she felt trapped, and she said it was a messy break up. she said it turned her off of relationships for a while until she can put it all behind her, so even though she admitted she had some feelings for me, she said that we'd have to stay "just friends" for now until she can figure things out. i hope maybe if i can be the guy who's always there for her, then she might start to get over it faster...but we'll see what happens.

Originally posted by Chris
She eventually came online, lots of talking about it, both said some kinda mean things, but tried to retract them pretty much as soon as the words were sent. Well, I felt like shit at work monday, but I had a while to think about it. Made for a very shitty day. But, one guy said something about my friend, thinking that he knew i liked her; he said, "bros before hoes". Well, I thought about it, and she was my friend first. So, I wrote another email, saying that I do want us to still be as good friends as we were before. We talked about it a bit more today. Got her to just come out and say she doesnt like me 'that way'. Really kinda sucks to hear that straight up, but, its better then doubt. Looks like I got caught in the dreaded 'friend' category. She was geneuinly sorry about the fact that she had hurt me, though, which is good I guess. She said that she made a mistake, and wasnt planning to even search out my friend again. She was actually kinda scared that I might hate her (I dont have it in me to really hate anyone :rolleyes: ), so, I know we are still 'good;. Actually, things started to return to 'normal', but Im still not anywhere near normal. I still cant really understand why she would just make out with a random guy; i actually helped her through some hard times, and would do anything for her. The old saying, "just because someone doesnt love you the way you love them, doesnt mean them they love you as much as they know how" doesnt really help. Whatever happened to friends with benefits; sometimes just being with someone with whom there is mutual respect can really help.
Argh, women sure are confusing; Even though I know that we would be a great match (today, I said that I just can talk to her so easily, and thats hard to find, and she said it back, so, :confused: )

Does anyone out there have any ideas as to my chances of *ever* having a shot with her, or should I just try and totally forget it, cuz I just have no chance?

Either way, Im glad things are finally cleared up, and that we can still be great friends.


Trust me man- you are lucky that you still have her as a friend- there are plenty of fishes is the sea for the taking (As a g/f) But old friends can never really be replaced. When girls go through break ups they are usually in an emotional rollercoaster- as are guys- but we just don't show it.


It's not that you have no chance- it's just that firends are something you need to cherish- beause they are the oneswho'll allways be there for you (Aside from family)

shit....if anything yall got the kiss of death right there....one thing i hate is to be a fuckin back-up.......guys just don't get used...don't want 2 see yall pissed cuz these women gave you guys the run-around

:what:
^
Female emotions over a 2 minute period...
*teh 0z doesn't get it either*

Taz don't understand them either and it is starting to drive him crazy.

i agree with oz :what: :help:

just dont be a back-up unless u like to feel used!!!