'03 Possible Fuel Pump Problem

[Crazygirl]

My Lexi is a 2003 T & C, 3.3 Liter Flex Fuel, and I always use E85 (the check engine light comes on if I use regular unleaded-she's a little picky). Driving home from work on the freeway this afternoon, Lexi's engine kind of lightly sputtered for a couple of seconds, but kept going. A minute later, the sputtering came back, and then while I had my foot on the gas pedal, she seemed to be losing power. Like a good little girl, I pulled off into the breakdown lane.
She was sputtering so bad in park that the van was physically shaking, so I turned off the ignition. I tried several times after that to start it, but the engine only cranked and didn't catch.
My darling hubby came to my rescue, looking things over and adding some gasoline (I was down to a quarter tank and was actually heading to the gas station), but no luck. Disparaged, I contacted my insurance company and finally got to use the Roadside service I pay for.
Mr. Tow Truck Driver got my baby home, and he got the van to start for a few moments, whereas he diagnosed that it sounded like the fuel pump was giving out. He recommended replacing the fuel filter and pump, which is apparently in the gas tank. He said he replaced his in 12 hours, and says it would be cheaper for us to do the work ourselves. "Just remove the two brackets, drop the gas tank, and the pump is on the top", he says.
If you're still with me, I guess what I want to know is, could the fuel pump go that bad that fast? Should I replace both, or just start with the filter? Is the pump really just on the inside top of the tank? My hubby has plenty of experience as a backyard mechanic-should he try this himself?
I really don't have several hundred dollars to just drop at a shop, especially if they do all that work and it turns out to be something else. Up until this evening, my little girl with 196,000 miles on her has been running pretty well.
I'm already having an awful month, so useful advice would be MUCH appreciated. I'm close to just quitting my job, abandoning my mortgage, and living off the grid, but I'll save that as a last resort. But, van repair first....

[RIP]

Prove the pump is bad. Make sure 20 amp fuse #20 is good. Turn the key to on/run. You should hear it spin for a second or two. Don't hear it? Remove the pump relay and jump contacts #30 and #87 together at the empty relay socket. The pump should spin right away. No keys needed. ID numbers are on the bottom of the relay. Won't spin? Smack the bottom middle of the tank with a mallet. You'd be surprised how often that unsticks a stuck pump.

A bit more in depth? Connect a fuel pressure gauge and check the pressure. Should see a constant 55 psi or there abouts. Some parts stores lend them out. Makes it easier if there is a test port on the fuel rail to connect to. If not you'll have to use adapters to connect it. Check the electrical connection at the pump for corrosion or damage. Check for power and ground while you're there. If you see it and the pumps not spinning, change the pump. If you don't see power swap the pump relay with another on the panel or replace it.

Can the pump fail that fast? Yes. Replace both? Yes. Is the pump on top of the tank? Well, that's how you access it. It's really mounted on top but most of it is inside the tank. Should hubby try this? Personally, I don't like working around an open fuel tank. I've read horror stories. That said, I read of guys changing pumps quite a bit without a problem. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5686a_U6uXQ

If you change the pump you'll have to make sure you'll install a pump meant for a flex fuel system.

Another part that often causes stalling is the crankshaft position sensor. When it fails you can crank the engine all day long. It just won't start. You'll lose ignition spark and sometimes fuel.