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09-20-2004, 08:45 PM | #1 | |
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You Are What You Drive
Acura Integra - I have always wanted to own the Buick of sports cars.
Acura Legend - I'm too bland for German cars. Acura NSX - I'm impotent. Audi 90 - I enjoy putting out engine fires. Buick Park Avenue - I'm older than 34 of the 50 states. Cadillac Eldorado - I'm a pimp. Cadillac Seville - I'm a very good Mary Kay salesman. Chevrolet Camaro - I enjoy beating the hell out of people. Chevrolet Chevette - I like seeing people's reactions when I tell them I have a 'Vette. Chevrolet Corvette - I'm in a mid-life crisis. Chevrolet El Camino - I am leading a militia to overthrow the government. Chrysler Cordoba - I dig the rich Corinthian leather. Datsun 280Z - I have a kilo of cocaine in my wheel well. Dodge Dart - I teach third grade special education and I voted for Eisenhower. Dodge Daytona - I delivered pizza for four years to get this car. Dodge Dakota - I've always wanted a womans pickup truck. Ferrari Testarossa - I'm known to prematurely ejaculate. Ford Fairmont - (See Dodge Dart). Ford Mustang Cobra - I slow down to 85 in school zones. Ford Crown Victoria - I enjoy having people slow to 55mph and change lanes when I pull up behind them. Geo Storm - I will start the 11th grade in the fall. Geo Tracker - I will start the 12th grade in the fall. Honda del Sol - I have always said, half a convertible is better than no convertible at all. Honda Civic - I have just graduated and have no credit. Honda Accord - I lack any originality and am basically a lemming. Infiniti Q45 - I'm a physician with 17 malpractice suits pending. Isuzu Impulse - I do not give a damn about J.D. Power or his reports. Jaguar XJ6 - I'm so rich I will pay 60K for a car that is in the shop 280 days per year. Kia Sephia - I learned nothing from the failure of Daihatsu Corp. Lamborghini Countach - I only have one testicle. Lincoln Town Car - I live for bingo and covered dish suppers. Lincoln Navigator - I love scaring the crap out of the guy who is driving a civic. Mercury Grand Marquis - I'm an AARP member and need my social security for the car payment. Mercedes 500SL - I can go 0-60 in about 6 seconds if the car doesnt fall apart at 50. Mercedes 560SEL - I'm dating a mechanic. Mercedes ML320 - I'm a badass soccer mom. Mazda Miata - I do not fear being decapitated by an eighteen-wheeler. MGB - I'm dating a midget. Mitsubishi Diamante - I don't know what it means either. Nissan 300ZX - I have yet to complete my divorce proceedings. Nissan Maxima - I couldn't afford an Infiniti. Oldsmobile Cutlass - I just stole this car and I'm going to make a fortune off the parts. Oldsmobille Bravada - I laugh in the face of the guy who's driving a Blazer. Peugeot 505 Diesel - I'm on the EPA's Ten Most Wanted List. Plymouth Neon - I sincerely enjoy doing the Macarena. Pontiac Trans AM - I have a switchblade in my sock. Pontiac GTO - Gas, Tires, & Orgasms. Pontiac Aztek - Too easy. Porsche 911 Turbo - I have a three inch thingie. Porsche 944 - I'm dating big haired women that otherwise would be inaccessible to me. Rolls Royce Silver Shadow - I think Pat Buchanon is a tad bit too liberal. Saturn SC2 - (See Honda Civic). Subaru Legacy - I have always wanted a Japanese car even more inferior than Isuzu. Toyota Camry - I'm still in the closet. Toyota Land Cruiser- I would go off road if I could. Volkswagen Cabriolet - I'm out of the closet. Volkswagen Microbus - I'm trippin right now. Volkswagen Beetle - I still watch Partridge Family reruns. Volvo 740 Wagon - I'm very frightened of my wife
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You're not your job. You're not how much money you have in the bank. You're not the car you drive. You're not the contents of your wallet. You're not your fucking khakis. You're the all-singing, all-dancing crap of the world. Beauty is in the eye of the beer holder... |
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09-20-2004, 10:09 PM | #2 | |
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Still can't find my car...
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I have P.M.S. and a gun. Excuse me, you have something to say? What's wrong with abstinence? |
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09-21-2004, 10:55 PM | #3 | |
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Re: You Are What You Drive
yeah me either.... but i can probably guess...
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Who needs AWD? i feel inspired by the original 911 turbo, my car will have more rubber sqeezed in its ass than Annabelle Chong! and it will go down as one of the greatest rides in history! |
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12-08-2004, 01:19 PM | #4 | |
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Re: You Are What You Drive
what's a 1990 Buick Century Limited 4 dr sedan?
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I'm back after a long mental evaluation and heavy medication! If you can't be a good example, you can always be a horrible warning! |
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12-10-2004, 07:58 PM | #5 | |
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Re: You Are What You Drive
How about the Thunderbird/Cougar? I'll make one up.
Ford Thunderbird: I enjoy beating V8 Mustangs with luxury or something to that extent.
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2002 F150 SuperCab FX4 6" Fabtech, 3" BL, Detroit locker, Edge tuned, Yukon 4.56s, 37" Nittos, Harley lights, Depo fogs, 8K HIDs, Powerstop brakes 1992 Lincoln Mark VII LSC 302 H.O, A9L ECU swap, 65mm TB, 73mm Granetelli MAF, FRPP 30lb injectors, Walbro 255, MSD ignition, Powerdyne BD11 supercharger, Efans, T-5 swap w/ FRPP flywheel, Ram HDX clutch and adjustable Steeda clutch quadrant, 4.10 gears, Nitto NT555R radials 2000 OBS Tahoe Z71 6k HIDs, 33" Goodyears. 280k mile daily beater |
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12-11-2004, 01:03 PM | #6 | |
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Re: You Are What You Drive
I have to second that last one!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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A founding member of HNF car club! Do you know what it feels like to do an amazing burnout listening to that wonderful exhaust note, Oh you drive a honda sorry dude, but theres hope they still make nitrous oxide! Racing a Honda is like being in the special olympics even if you win your still retarded! |
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12-15-2004, 12:11 AM | #7 | |
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Re: You Are What You Drive
Yea!!
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01-08-2005, 01:46 PM | #8 | |
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Re: You Are What You Drive
Just saw the one about the Legacy.
Whoever made this up please look at the new B4...
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I have P.M.S. and a gun. Excuse me, you have something to say? What's wrong with abstinence? |
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01-08-2005, 03:46 PM | #9 | |
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Re: You Are What You Drive
mmmm the GT-B's aren't bad either
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Who needs AWD? i feel inspired by the original 911 turbo, my car will have more rubber sqeezed in its ass than Annabelle Chong! and it will go down as one of the greatest rides in history! |
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01-12-2005, 11:49 PM | #10 | |
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Re: You Are What You Drive
Anyone that didn't see the Blitzer version of it and says that has a serious personal issue against the nice looking Legacy.
Check these out. http://www.subaru.co.jp/square/galle...acy/index.html http://www.subaru.co.jp/square/galle...legacy/02.html
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I have P.M.S. and a gun. Excuse me, you have something to say? What's wrong with abstinence? |
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01-14-2005, 02:45 PM | #11 | |||
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Re: Re: You Are What You Drive
Quote:
I like this...: I have to say that the Subaru produces some of the best looking wagons. The only one I'm not a big fan of is the WRX wagon...because the sedan rocks
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Quote:
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01-16-2005, 11:52 AM | #12 | |
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Re: You Are What You Drive
...and rolls and pitches...
go for a ride in an audi s3 right after a wrx and you'll see how much they saved on the suspension.
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Who needs AWD? i feel inspired by the original 911 turbo, my car will have more rubber sqeezed in its ass than Annabelle Chong! and it will go down as one of the greatest rides in history! |
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01-16-2005, 12:36 PM | #13 | |
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Re: You Are What You Drive
haha i enjoy beating the hell out of people- camaro
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"Hasta la victoria siempre!"-Ernesto "Che" Guevara |
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01-16-2005, 12:49 PM | #14 | |
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Re: You Are What You Drive
haha that's the attitude the last camaro like that i saw had... last time i saw it he was getting smaller in the rear view mirror.
__________________
Who needs AWD? i feel inspired by the original 911 turbo, my car will have more rubber sqeezed in its ass than Annabelle Chong! and it will go down as one of the greatest rides in history! |
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01-17-2005, 01:52 AM | #15 | |
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Re: You Are What You Drive
you saw a camaro getting smaller on ur rear view mirror? and you have a.....? MR2 is it? yeah fat chance you will ever see a camaro or any american car in your rear view mirror buddy.
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"Hasta la victoria siempre!"-Ernesto "Che" Guevara |
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