what is the large bar that the engine sits on that stretches from one side of the frame to the other? i always thought it was called the engine mount but while trying to look up a new one, i recently dented the crap out of mine when i hit a boulder, i kept finding the ends but i need the actual beam, so what should i search for?

That is the anti-sway bar.or a stabilizer bar. It is called both of those names and a few more.