What common words, phrases and sounds actually mean, when a woman says them...

Fine: This is the word we use at the end of any argument that we feel we are right about but need to shut you up. NEVER use fine to describe how a woman looks. This will cause you to have one of those arguments.

Five minutes: This is half an hour. It is equivalent to the five minutes that your football game is going to last before you take out the trash, so it's an even trade.

Nothing: This means something and you should be on your toes. "Nothing" is usually used to describe the feeling a woman has of wanting to turn you inside out, upside down, and backwards. "Nothing" usually signifies an argument that will last "Five Minutes" and end with the word "Fine".

Go Ahead (with raised eyebrows): This is a dare. One that will result in a woman getting upset over "Nothing" and will end with the word "Fine".

Go Ahead (normal eyebrows): This means "I give up" or "do what you want because I don't care". You will get a raised eyebrow "Go ahead" in just a few minutes, followed by "Nothing" and "Fine" and she will talk to you in about "Five Minutes" when she cools off.

Loud Sigh: This is not actually a word, but is still often a verbal statement very misunderstood by men. A "Loud Sigh" means she thinks you are an idiot at that moment and wonders why she is wasting her time standing here and arguing with you over "Nothing".

Soft Sighs: Again, not a word, but a verbal statement. "Soft Sighs" are one of the few things that you can actually understand. She is content. Your best bet is to not move or breathe and she will stay content.

Oh: This word followed by any statement is trouble. Example; "Oh, let me get that". Or, "Oh, I talked to so and so about what you were doing last night." If she says "Oh" before a statement, RUN, do not walk, to the nearest exit. She will tell you that she is "Fine" when she is done tossing your clothes out the window, but do not expect her to talk to you for at least 2 days.

Oh (as the lead to a sentence): Usually signifies that you are caught in a lie. Do not try to lie more to get out of it, or you will get a raised eyebrows "Go ahead" followed by acts so unspeakable that we can't bring ourselves to write about them.

That's Okay: This is one of the most dangerous statements that a woman can say. "That's Okay" means that she wants to think long and hard before paying you retributions for whatever it is that you have done. "That's Okay" is often used with the word "Fine" and used in conjunction with a raised eyebrow "Go ahead". At some point in the near future when she has plotted and planned, you are going to be in some mighty big trouble.

Please Do: This is not a statement, it is an offer. A woman is giving you the chance to come up with whatever excuse or reason you have for doing whatever it is that you have done. You have a fair chance to tell the truth, so be careful and you shouldn't get a "That's Okay".

Thanks: A woman is thanking you. Do not faint; just say you're welcome.

Thanks a lot: This is much different from "Thanks". A woman will say, "Thanks a lot" when she is really ticked off at you. It signifies that you have hurt her in some callous way, and will be followed by the "Loud Sigh". Be careful not to ask what is wrong after the "Loud Sigh", as she will only tell you "Nothing".

I hope this clears up any misunderstandings...





*DVS picks up and runs for cover before the women arrive*

I had to Respond... THIS IS 150% accurate.. OMG god.. i need to Print this out, and walk around with them in my pocket... what u say?:D :smoker2: :flash:

Lol, Good stuff DVS :hehehe: :Hehehe:

Bahwhawhawhawha!

:hehehe: :hehehe: :hehehe: :hehehe: :hehehe: :hehehe: :hehehe: :hehehe: :hehehe: :hehehe: :hehehe: :hehehe: :hehehe: :hehehe: :hehehe: :hehehe: :hehehe: :hehehe: :hehehe: :hehehe: :hehehe: :hehehe: :hehehe: :hehehe: :hehehe: :hehehe: :hehehe: :hehehe: :hehehe: :hehehe:

A "True" insight into a womens mind.

The Panda has seen this from Spec2!!!

means we need :help: :help: :help: :help:

rofl :hehehe: :hehehe: nice one DVS, keep runnin though, non of the women seem to have read this yet :lol2:

hahaha even I admit some of them are actually true. :hehehe: :p

WHY do women behave this way? I would really like to know.

As Doc Brown says (in that movie with the DeLorean in it): "I can finally have the time to solve the last great mystery of the world... Women!"

Now, I understand the enchantment of a little mystery, but negative ambiguity is another thing...

You mean someone has actually taken the time to figure out what women mean :eek:

That must have taken a lifetime or many lifetimes:p

HAHAHAHAHAHAHHAA, very nice DVS!! Very funny...


:bandit:

Originally posted by StageOneGalant
i need to Print this out, and walk around with them in my pocket...

I agree :D

I agree, mostly true. :D

:D :D
copy/paste/send to Mrs DVS

:finger: :finger: :finger: :finger: ...NOTHING FOR YOU TONIGHT

Not even I can refute any of these!!! :p :hehehe: :lol2:

*DVS takes a small peek, but leaves anyway. Not taking chances.*

Originally posted by DVSNCYNIKL
*DVS takes a small peek, but leaves anyway. Not taking chances.*

U can come back they seem to be pretty calm with this thread, :D

Originally posted by ragt20


U can come back they seem to be pretty calm with this thread, :D

Okay. Whewww!!! I was beginning to worry if this was all a deliberate trap to bring me out of hiding and up for lynching.:D :D :D

:hehehe: :hehehe: :hehehe: :hehehe: :hehehe: rofl...

Nice one DVS...Ever thought of becoming a "marriage counsellor"?



P-Man will laugh his guts out at the way you are sneaking around -can I say "pussy-whupped' in OT without getting shot?Who cares,I said it now.....

Originally posted by taranaki
:hehehe: :hehehe: :hehehe: :hehehe: :hehehe: rofl...

Nice one DVS...Ever thought of becoming a "marriage counsellor"?



P-Man will laugh his guts out at the way you are sneaking around -can I say "pussy-whupped' in OT without getting shot?Who cares,I said it now.....

:DMy marriage counseling license was revoked due to the fact that women were getting upset that I was revealing all of their secrets to the fellas. I'm an equal opportunist!:D


As for the sneaking around, I have battle scars from the early OT days. My fear is substantiated.:D:D:D But now with my new survival kit, I'm back for seconds.:devil::devil: