my car hates me

Ok this is the deal I'm a woman married for 15 years to a master mechanic now divorced. He won't help me with anything now that he's with the "bimbo." So I don't want anyone to think since I am a woman I am clueless because I know more about cars than I care to know thanks to HIM. This is the deal. I have a 1992 chevy euro lumina sedan 3.1. It has had so many problems I swear the dam thing is possessed. The most recent things are, upon getting up for work my car started fine, this was back in March. It ran fine and I drive about 20 minutes to work. I got in my car to come home it started but I thought it sounded a bit sluggish but it did start. I had to stop at the store and was in maybe 3 minutes I came back out and it barely started. I got home and just on a whim I shut off the engine and tried to start it again. I got nothing, just a clicking noise as if the battery was shot. It sat over night but then started again in the morning without me doing anything to it. So since this episode I have first replaced the starter, I got it at a junk yard used but it started the car, once. So then I turned over the key and got nothing at all. I was told that the spike in the starter possibly ruined the battery. I took the battery out and had them test it, nothing.. it was dead. I bought a new battery, the car ran but barely. I was able to drive it to the parts store and they did a diagnostic free check which then showed my alternator was shot and running soley off my battery. I went back to the junk yard for an alternator. i was told at the parts store that to install the alternator I had to disconnect the battery and give it a full charge and hook up the alternator then the battery if i didn't follow this rule I could possibly ruin the battery like the starter did. I thought this was a load of crap so I replaced the alternator my way and did not have a battery charger and things seemed fine. I had tons of power but now a new problem has developed and I don't know if it is related to this or not. I am only trying to get it to run to sell so I do not want to spend money on it. Ok I thought wow I fixed it so i'll go drive it and make sure that no moisture got in the fuel line and all that since it sat for almost 3 months straight. It runs perfect in park or neutral. As soon as I put it in drive/reverse the thing wants to stall in fact it does cut out if I take my foot off the gas. So i checked to make sure I got the throttle cable hooked up right from the alternator (why did chevy decide to put the alternator where they did it was near impossible to get to?) and it is fine. I am at a loss. The car will not run ( yet runs fine in park or neutral) unless you drive with both feet one on the gas and one covering the brake. I changed the air filter, added fuel injector cleaner, It has a new oil filter and oil due to the mess of replacing the starter, and I noticed that the RPM's on the tach will barely register unless I am reving the engine. Please help I want this car GONE. I hate it. Please tell me this isn't another one of those jobs where I am covered in oil, I did not like that surprise as I am sure you could imagine. I would appreciate any sort of advice possible. Thanks so much, Tammy

You lost me at "throttle cable hooked up right to the alternator", I know that's not what you meant, but I don't know what you did mean.

I assume you are just having an issue with idle strategy memory loss from having the battery disconnected while doing the alternator (you did unhook the battery, right?...otherwise you could fry the ECM)

When they loose idle memory, they stall under load, surge up and down, etc. Try removing the ECM fuse for about 20 minutes and put it back in. You can also block the wheels and set the parking brake, put it in gear and keep it running, slowly taking your foot off the gas until it will idle by itself, then let it sit and idle in gear until the radiator fan comes on, and by then it should have relearned correct idle strategy.

PS, the alternator was the problem all along...it ran the battery down while driving, enough that it couldn't start, then the battery recovered enough charge while sitting overnight to start it. That'll happen if the alternator is weak and you are running a lot of accessories (wipers, A/C, or whatever)

When you put the new battery in, the regulator sensed a fully charged battery in the circuit, and commanded the alternator to cut it's charge back, further irritating the already weak electric situation, and making the car run poorly.

I remember a lot of those older one's alternator would go bad without any indication from the dash (warning light) but would run terrible.